Category Archives: Big Bag of Dreams

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Turning Desperation Into Inspiration

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We all have moments of being stuck in indecision. It can be like a spinning hamster wheel in your head leaving you circling round and round never moving in any real direction and unable to decide which way to go.

Some people make long lists using a sort of Ben Franklin approach with a line down the center of a page and headings of pro and con to help when making a decision. This may work well if a yes or no answer is required, but most of life’s questions need more than a this or that kind of response.

Sometimes you need a more creative approach to sort things out and mind-mapping is one that works well for me. It offers more than just a yes or no solution and often helps clarify the question.

Internet Image from Wikipedia

Mind-mapping expands rather than limits my options and often uncovers possibilities I hadn’t considered when struggling with a problem. More importantly it takes me out of an energy sapping cycle and gets me moving in ways that are more productive.

Mine tend to look more like the one below with just words rather than the one above with the pictures too.

Mind-mapping Guidelines (Image From Wikipedia)

While there are software programs designed to help with mind-mapping, I prefer the old-fashioned way using colored pens and paper, a technique I learned at my first creative workshop around 1982. It’s been life changing and I’ll be forever grateful to my good friend Bill Merritt, for taking me along that day.

Wikipedia Image

Give it a try if you’re feeling stuck in some area of your life to see what you may discover and if you’re willing to share your results, send me a photo and I’ll post it here.

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Building A Bridge – Book By Book

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Artist Under The Respryn Bridge - Cornwall

Some people are natural bridge builders. They see an obstacle and look for ways to overcome it. Sometimes they work alone and sometimes they come together to do a greater good. There’s a lot of chat on the internet now about a book that can save lives. It’s a collection of essays from a few people I read regularly and a good many more that are new to me.

More important for me than the 62 essays is the collective idea that by working together, we can make a change. Some days you need a reminder that the world is bigger than your little part of it. Some days you need a bridge.

Take a second to read what Brené Brown has to say, she may be part of the bridge’s foundation, but you can still be a stone in the arch that supports it.

Marco Polo describes a bridge, stone by stone.

“But which is the stone that support the bridge?” Kublai Khan asks.
“The bridge is not supported by one stone or another,” Marco answers, “ but by the line of the arch that they form.”

Kublai Khan remains silent, reflecting. Eventually, the Great Khan adds: “ Why do you speak to me of the stones? It is only the arch that matters to me!”

To which Polo retorts: “Without stones there is no arch”

~ Italo Calvino’s “Invisible Cities”

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Risking A Fall To Get What You Want

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Elizabeth Walking Her Path - 2011

That was me yesterday standing on the edge of bridge so I could get a better shot. I felt pretty safe up there especially as it wasn’t my first time. I climbed up back in May of 2008 right after I had rented my house to strangers, quit my job, turned down another job offer, and sold my car and most of the stuff I’d spent my whole life accumulating.

You see I had a plan for a new life and there was no room for excess stuff. I was traveling light which meant hanging on to only the things and people that mattered most to me.

John and I were still a new relationship back then having only met in person three months earlier, but I knew I was doing the right thing in leaving for love like I did. Having lived a pretty full life for my then 47 years, I knew that sometimes risk was necessary even if when the outcome couldn’t be predicted.

Some folks back home in Georgia thought I was crazy for selling off my stuff and essentially moving to a country where I would be considered a visitor and only allowed to stay for six months out of the year, but I believed that no matter what happened I’d be okay.

I have always believed the Helen Keller quote that, ” Life is a grand adventure or nothing at all ” so off I went … following my heart to Cornwall all wide open with the possibility that the risk involved might yield the best possible results.

And as most of you know, it did!

If however, you’d had a window into my life and events the year before I met John you might be surprised that I had ever been willing to risk a single thing for love. What happened then is an old story with a modern twist and not one you’re likely to read here, but I’m sure it will turn up in the book I’ve been working on recently. I haven’t gotten very far with it yet. Most of it exists on index cards right now as I run through my memories mining for the events that have mattered the most.

There’s all kinds fear in writing memoir such as who might read it and get upset, who might remember it differently, and the really big one, what if revealing the past affects your present in ways you can’t control and ways you don’t like.

Having heard my stories since we first met, John has encouraged to me write them down. By stories I mean my true life stories, not the fiction ones which may have a thread of truth through them, but come mostly from my imagination.

During my recent summer of  ” Lost and Found ” a few other people echoed the same message to me. Some of them were only repeating what they’d said before encouraging me once again to put my real life into words more permanent the occasional musings over coffee or a shared meal.

My longtime friend Patrice, and newer friend Greta Jaeger are two of the people I’m referring to. Both of them not only gave me ” the talk ” about writing my story, but they paid for dinner too. Greta works as a life coach and did such a good job over appetizers that I jokingly said I felt as if I should write her a check for a session as she left me with so much to consider.

My friend Carla Johnson did the final wrap up a few months later when she asked me some pointed questions about writing and my goals. Carla can cut to the heart of something with the skill of a surgeon and after years of working with medically fragile people, she knows how to help expose the truth without leaving you bleeding.

This post finds inspiration from many people, but the biggest push came from reading the revealing email below that I received from Marianne Elliot this morning.

I subscribe to more than I can read these days so most things like this go into the trash pretty quickly. This one caught my eye because I was interested to read about an event she had to cancel, one that for whatever reason did not work out and how she choose to see it as an opportunity to try a new way rather than an excuse to dwell in the negative messages that most of us tell ourselves when we feel afraid or overwhelmed by circumstance.

I’ll leave you with her email (along with another photo of me from 2008 ) and hope you find some encouragement if you need a little today.

Marianne Elliot’s email,  Subject: Ever fallen flat on your face? I just did. And here’s how I’m dusting myself off.

” You know the Creative Flow workshop in Berkeley I’ve been telling you about for the past couple of months?

Well, it just didn’t take. 
Maybe it was the wrong workshop. Maybe it was just the wrong time. Maybe I’m terrible at marketing. Maybe no-one likes me (I know, I know. Lots of people like me. But I did wonder that for a moment. I am human after all.)
Whatever the reason, we just didn’t get the sign-ups and had to cancel. I felt like I had really put myself out there for the first time in the US by offering up an in-person workshop, and had fallen flat on my face. In front of all of you. And all my creative friends. 
I felt a bit like I used to in school when I would try a new trick with my skipping rope and end up tripping myself up, landing on my ass. Face flushed. Heart racing. Ashamed. 
But I’m not a little girl any more. Thank goodness. These days I can recognise my own shame and fear, and I know that we all share those experiences. I also know that sometimes things just don’t work out and even though you might have something to learn from it, it doesn’t mean that you are a failure. 
It might just mean that you should try it a different way. 
So I’m trying this a different way. Instead of the weekend workshop I’m teaching a 90 minute Creative Flow yoga class at 10am this Saturday at the Teahouse Studio, 1250 Addison St, Ste 20, Berkeley.
I understand that an entire weekend was a lot of time, and $380 was a lot of money, to commit right now. So instead lets practice together for 90 minutes. You just need to bring $25, a yoga mat and a journal and pen. We are going to do a little bit of writing to explore how opening the creative flow in our bodies can support our creative work. But you don’t need to consider yourself a ‘writer’ to do this. I promise!
If you’d like to come do a 90 minute class with me this Saturday please RSVP to teahousestudio@gmail.com
On the other hand, we’ve had great sign-ups for the Off the Mat, Yoga in Action workshop atYoga Pearl in Portland next Wednesday. There are a few places left though, so if you were thinking of coming and just hadn’t registered yet, you do still have time. That one runs for three hours (from 5.30-8.30pm on Weds 17th) and costs $50. You can learn more about it here and register here.
And thank you – for being here to witness me as I learn these lessons and for being so encouraging along the way. 
Love, 
Marianne “

Elizabeth On The Edge - May 2008

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And The Winner Is …

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John Biking On Bodmin Moor

When my sweet husband bought me a bike of my own, he gave me a gift that made my heart very happy and I’ve had the wildest thoughts while zipping through the lanes or pushing hard to make it up hills. Due to having only three gears, I love how this little beauty makes me work a bit harder to get up the steeper places. Somehow the success at the top feels more like I’ve earned it. I could not have done it half so well without my season of spin classes and think this new bicycle and I shall become the best of friends.

That said let’s move on to the naming and why I chose the one I did. I tend to assign meaning to most things in life so I should not be surprised that the idea of a name for my new ‘girlfriend ‘ seemed important.

Thanks to everyone who offered a suggestion yesterday. They were all lovely in their own way and I appreciated the explanations as well. Angie came closest to the name I chose … offering something similar, but not quite what I had in mind.

I’m calling her Dora and here’s why …

When I was riding so hard up the hills around our village for the first time, I could almost hear the music playing when the bad witch rides by during the tornado scene in the Wizard of Oz movie. Although not the actual scene I’m referring to, this video link has the music I was hearing in my head on those hills.

Counter the witch imagery with the thrill and excitement of flying down through the lanes and you have some of the childlike enthusiasm I was feeling the rest of the time even going so far as to let out a few ” Weeeee, I love this biiiiiiiike” screams in places where my joy could not be contained.

Given the visual imagery, music, and my struggle to go home, how could I not think of Dorothy, her ruby slippers, (my bike is a deep shade of red) and the witch who had to be conquered. Even though Dorothy was was a front-runner, I knew I wanted something shorter and more racy for my girl. I thought Dora might work and when I checked online, I found it was a nickname for Dorothy and that it meant ‘gift’ which seemed just about perfect since she was gifted to me by John.

I know in America that ‘Dora the Explorer ‘ has been a favorite of young girls in particular for some time and while I had no thought at all about that Dora, I feel sure that my Dora and I will do quite a bit of exploring as we spin our way to new adventures.

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Choosing A Name For My New Baby

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Elizabeth Dodging Sheep On Bodmin Moor

Thanks so much to everyone who commented on yesterday’s post and celebrated my return to Cornwall and John. What a great welcome back it was to have such a thoughtful gift from him. I love how he listens to my not so secret dreams and surprises me with an action.

Now … I need a little fun help from you.

I’ve never really been someone who gave names to things like cars and bikes, but with my lovely retro looking ride, I find that I am thinking of a special name for her. I have something clearly in mind, but I might change it (although not likely) if you leave one that wows me.

I’ve got my reasons why I’m leaning in the direction I am, but I’d love to hear what you think before making a final decision. Thanks for your help!

I’m putting my vanity aside and leaving the photo above one you can enlarge even though my hair looks a fright. I want you to be able to see the sheep on the road and the moor. This is one of the roads we drive on regularly to get to our village. When you meet an oncoming car you have to pull over which is easier than meeting in the mostly narrow lanes where someone must backup.

 

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A Sweet Send Off At Sublime Doughnuts In Atlanta

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Sublime Doughnuts In Atlanta Georgia

I know it may seem strange to follow the previous post about spinning and weight loss with one about my favorite place to go for doughnuts, but hey, like most people I’m striving for balance and my balanced life has to include doughnuts. So … let me show you what I was doing this morning while the rest of you were having your oatmeal and fruit cups.

Within walking distance to my home in Atlanta, there is place that sells a sweet treat so mouth-watering that you’ll be planning your next visit while you’re still licking the crumbs of your last bite from your fingertips.

In the photo above you can see what I sampled this morning. I had a Caramel Apple Fritter which had been my number one until I tried something called a Chocolate Wildberry Fritter that I laughingly described to my friend Kimberly as a Chocolate ” Crackberry ” Fritter because it was so good I thought I might easily become addicted.

The Red Velvet Cake doughnut was tasty and sweet, but after polishing off the Caramel Apple Fritter and half of the Crackberry, I mean Chocolate Wildberry, all I could manage was a bite-size slice of the Red Velvet Cake doughnut and wrapped up the rest to share later with my daughter.

I was already living in the UK when Kamal Grant decided to put his creative culinary skills, education, and experience to use in a business of his own called Sublime Doughnuts and while his success is no surprise to those who flock to savor the fresh-all-day treats, you might be surprised to learn that he opened Sublime Doughnuts when he was only 28. You have to admire a man who leaves a good job in down economy and cashes in his 401K to go after a dream.

Chef Kamal Grant - Owner Of Sublime Doughnuts

He’s had loads of well deserved awards and great reviews and I found that success hasn’t gone to his head as he graciously posed for pictures not once, but twice with me this morning. I was having a photo snapped with him when my friend Kimberly Krautter arrived and after she and I had a chance to eat doughnuts and catch up, we took a few more shots with Kamal to remember the day.

Kimberly and I were students in the Theatre Department at the University of Georgia in the 80s and had not seen each other since 1987. She’s been pretty busy following her own dreams and you can learn more about her by clicking on her name.

Elizabeth Harper & Kimberly Krautter with Doughnut Wizard, Chef Kamal Grant - Owner Of Sublime Doughnuts

I’m in Marietta for a few last days packing my life into more bags than I arrived with when my plane landed in April. I’ve managed to accumulate quite a bit of stuff during my unexpected extended stay, but I just might have room for a few doughnuts for the plane if I can convince my daughter to stop on our way to the airport early next week. I think I can find a bit of room to carry them on the plane, but the real question might be will they last long enough to arrive?
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My Tweed Run Dreams Need Wheels To Make It Happen

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Internet Photo

Do you remember when I said I wanted the bike above, but my budget wasn’t having it. I still don’t own one yet, but if I did manage to acquire the classic beauty by this time next year, I could dress up and ride in this London event.

If I was really lucky, I might also bump into a celebrity on a bike like Ewan McGregor who happened to be next to the partner of a blogger I read. (There’s picture proof on her blog)

Antonia Cornwell is one of the bloggers I referred to when I wrote a post about swearing. I’m always interested to see what she has to say even if I am a bit shocked at times. She wrote about her experience during the Tweed Run this weekend and it’s well worth reading. Pop over for second and have a look at her photos, you’ll enjoy them. I’ve feel like I’ve seen her daughter grow up online and loved the picture of her pedaling behind her mom.

Even though I joked about possible celebrity sightings next year, I would be over the moon to pedal up along side Antonia and her family. I’d be so excited that I might even shout, “Whoopee!” instead of Antonia. You have to click to find out why …

 

 

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The Write About Love Project

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Last September, the universe sent me a message.

Written on a gravestone in a Paris cemetery,

were three little words for me to figure out.

If you’d like to see what I came up with,

click on the link below

and go to

‘ The Write About Love Project ‘

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Making It My Business

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For longer than I want to admit, at least one or more of the books above have had a place on my bookshelf. Despite having good intentions for years, everything else has always been more of a priority. Until now.

I’m hoping that some of what I write this year will find a home thanks to the content and directions found in these books. I’m writing each day treating it like it’s my work because finally, after years of scribbling unfinished stories, I’m making it my business.

Thanks to everyone who left a kind message of support and celebration on my last post. Completing my first short story and getting it out by the deadline was a turning point which feels like just a beginning.

Some of you expressed an interest in reading it and asked if I might post the story. I would love to share it, but since I’ve entered it in a competition, I can’t post it here. I am grateful for your interest and hope you’ll be able to see it somewhere soon.

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Completion – 2011 Is About – Completion

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I chose this photo John took of me because it looks as if I am a bit overwhelmed which is how I feel at times heading into this new year thinking of all that must be completed.

Creative projects and story ideas trail after me like streaming ribbons on a kite’s tail each temporarily aloft when the power of a strong wind lifts them or my feet move fast enough to keep them up in the air. Never one to be at a loss for inspiration, I struggle with another aspect which is equally important … completion.

This is not to say that I don’t get things done because I recognize the power I have to do what some might consider impossible. My history is made up of multiple instances where even I can look back and say with a bit of astonishment, ” How did I do that ? ”

But when it comes to some of the more creative things, I tend to get bogged down in details that can derail an idea or project fairly quickly pushing it to the backseat while the newer, prettier one gets to sit up front with me like a favored child for the day.

While I often take huge leaps of faith in some areas, when it comes to the creative areas of my life, I tend to research too long or look to those who have gone before for guidance and direction when if I just get in the car and go, basic directions and intuition can usually take me to the place I need to be.

I have a long list of things which must be completed in 2011 some of which are practical and important for everyday life while others are necessary for my creative spirit which is really my foundation and a sort of gas tank that fuels my enthusiasm for daily life.

January is all about the practical as immigration issues loom large with testing, large cash outlays, appointments, and interviews, all requiring my immediate and focused attention. Add to that, my UK driving test must be taken with both theory and practical tests as I have been here way too long to be driving with my American license and you may begin to see why I am obsessing a bit about completion.

While John and I together and individually had the good fortune to spend much of 2010 traveling, this year will find me staying and working on projects closer to our home in Cornwall. I am looking forward to planting myself in one place for the bulk of the year with only short trips away and a few extended visits to see my family in America. Knowing from experience what it takes for me to accomplish a task, I think some of my many creative goals will certainly be able to be completed during this new year.

One of my Big Bag Of Dreams Goals that I spoke about here will have to wait another year even though it’s been throughly researched and planned. Based on where I am with other goals on my list, hosting my BBOD’s workshop this year feels like skipping a few chapters when reading a ” how to ” book so I am putting it in the backseat until next year. The favored front seat has a long list of occupants waiting for their spin around the block and if I can keep the pushing and shoving to a minimum, I think I might be able to give most them a turn.

Completion is often defined as ” The act or process of completing or the quality or state of being complete. ”

While I don’t feel a need to tick off boxes each day to note what I’ve accomplished, I do see how the act of completing certain goals can help one feel more complete, a word which in its first part is defined as ” having all necessary parts. ”

In 2011, I will be working on completion. Have you chosen a word to guide you through this year or a particular goal that tops your list? If you have, please share it below and include a link if you’ve written about it somewhere. Feel free to think about it and come back later to share too.

Here’s to dreaming and doing in this new year !

I want to thank Marie Scudder for her post over at Vision and Verb today. My one word post for 2011 was still trying to gel until I read what she had to say in her piece, ” Paper and String.”