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Baby Steps

 

John Walking With Mom

John Walking With Mom

Sometimes all we need is a little support when we’re learning how to do things we’ve never done before. In the picture above, John is wearing something they call a walking harness and reins here in England. It’s designed to increase stability and confidence when young ones are learning to walk. Parents can hold onto the reins giving the illusion of total independence, while keeping the child a bit safer and somewhat close at hand.  You still see them in use here as I saw recently when we were out one day. 

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There are times lately when I feel like I could use a guiding hand at the end of a set of reins. The work I’m doing these days is multi-layered and requires a good bit of  juggling.  I’m teaching myself how to do things I’ve never done before and it’s just plain hard at times. I see other people doing the very things I want to do with such ease and I forget that it often looks easy because they’ve been doing it a while. I try to remind myself of this when I feel frustrated that I haven’t moved as quickly in the creative directions I have mapped out in my mind and on paper.  On days when my frustrations threaten a total boycott of creative focus, I find myself saying, ” Baby steps, Elizabeth…walk first.” Being a runner in real life, my daily internal dialogue can mirror what goes on in my head during a race and suddenly the creative process gets bogged with chatter that sounds a bit like , “where’s the finish line, how much time do I have left to get there, who’s in front, and can I push through this pain…”  

I’ve rewritten a last paragraph five different ways and still don’t like the look it so..I’m going to finish with these last words and get back to work… remembering as I go, that baby steps are just first steps and they’ll get bigger as I grow.

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Primroses & Powershots

I thought I’d show you a little of what goes on behind the scenes here at Gifts Of The Journey and I need to say now…it isn’t always pretty. I’m almost never without a camera of some kind. It could be my iPhone or my Nikon D200, but more often than not it’s my Canon Powershot G9. Last week, I was running through the churchyard on my way to what I refer to as the buttercup field, when I was overwhelmed by a carpet of flowers that seemed to have popped out almost overnight. There were primroses everywhere I looked blanketing the ground like a patchwork quilt. I had my iPhone with me, but I wanted to get a higher quality picture so I went on with my run, but cut it a bit short to get back to the house to pick up my Canon. It was a perfect weather day, but given how it can be sunny one minute and dark and rainy the next, I didn’t want to take any chances and I barely paused as I told John what I was up to while running in and out for the camera. He said he would walk down and join me in a few minutes and showed up a little later with his own camera.  Here’s a bit of what he captured of me that day along with the bottom three which are my images. 

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I didn’t realize until later that I had been so excited about getting the photographs that I wanted that I’d forgotten to take out my earphones even though I wasn’t listening to music. See below…

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Remember what I said about it’s not always pretty….well here goes..

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Would you like to see what I was trying to get a decent shot of back in the shadows?

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I think it’s one of the oldest gravestones in the churchyard, but I don’t have info on it yet.  

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These are two more of my photos from that morning…

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This churchyard is one of my favorites in Cornwall and much to my surprise, there  are a few Harpers buried there. No relation I’m sure, but interesting to see my name among the gravestones.

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A Few Things About Me

I was tagged by the talented Melissa who can be found here. According the the rules, I’m supposed to fill out this little Q & A and tag eight people to do the same. I decided to shift it a bit and added a few photographs to help you see what I’m talking about…show and tell…one of my very favorite things in school.

Additionally, for those who would like to give this a whirl, you get to delete a question and add one of your own. My question is the first one below. I’m tagging these eight people and if you’re checking me out, scoot on over to a few of these folks when you get a chance and have a look around their space. I know they’ll make you feel welcome. Thanks again Melissa.  Now for my eight in no special order (they’re all special)… Kim, Hay, Leslye, Carolyn, Kerstin Darcy, Maz, Alycia, Leaca, Bim, and  Jules.

The question I added is the first one.

Who was your childhood hero or person you most admired and why? My aunt, Wylly Folk St. John. She was a published author of many children’s books and twice nominated and runner up for the Edgar Allen Poe Mystery Writer’s of America award. She made me a character in one of her books (I bet you can’t guess which one) and gave me some of the best presents I’ve ever received. Her gifts were always lumpy strangely wrapped bundles of books and handmade treasures, like a pin cushion tomato that she embroidered my name on the side. I still have it almost forty years later. She brought a sense of belonging into my life with every letter and I think about her almost everyday.

What is your current obsession? Taming the wild ponies of Bodmin Moor with sugar cubes.

What are you wearing? My UK uniform …  sweater, backpack, jeans, good walking shoes and a camera.

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Do you nap a lot? No, but when I do, I power nap. 12 minutes and I feel as refreshed as if I’d had a full five hour night.

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Who was the last person you hugged? My darling husband, John

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If you were a tree, what tree would you be? A little one like below reaching towards the light

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What’s for dinner? This is more like what John had for dinner last night at the pub. I had a burger and chips (fries)

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What was the last thing you bought? Today …I bought five packs of my new favorite Chocolate Mint Gum (Sugar Free)

What are you listening to right now? Carry You Home – Listen Here

What is your favorite weather? Blue Sky

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Say something to the person who tagged you: Hello Melissa…this is the very first time I’ve done one of these Q & A things and it was a lot of fun…thanks for sending it my way.


If you could have a house, fully furnished and paid for, anywhere in the world, where would it be? Scotland, Isle of Skye

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Favorite vacation spot? The western highlands of Scotland

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What would you like to have in your hands right now? My former dog Bones now renamed Beau who lives with a sweet woman who dotes on him and lets him sleep in her bed. (He didn’t get to do this with me)  I see him every time I go back to Georgia.

What would you like to get rid of? My house in Atlanta Georgia

What is your favorite tea flavor? No tea… I don’t like it!

If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would it be? In Cornwall, walking the coast path with my daughter and her dog.

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What is your favorite snack?

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Dog or cat? I love them both, but…. I miss this dear little dog.

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What’s Behind Door Number One, Two, Three…

What we really want to do is what we are really meant to do. When we do what we are meant to do, money comes to us, doors open for us, we feel useful, and the work we do feels like play to us.

– Julia Cameron

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Sometimes, it’s difficult to choose which direction is right. It’s fine to say follow your dreams and the money will follow, but for most of us who have in the past or who may be currently struggling with how to pay for basics such food and shelter…dream seeking may seem like a luxury right now.

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Others, may find themselves financially able to seek, but they find they’re not sure where to look.

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Some of us may find ourselves standing in front of doors we never thought would be before us.

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These days are perfect in some ways for leaping off into directions we might have been afraid to venture until recently. With the economic downturn, some people have no choice. We are reminded every day now that nothing is secure. Many people I know have been laid off from companies that they gave almost all of their time and energy to…often missing important times with family and friends or working themselves sick. They traded moments they can never get back. I’ve done that myself and no award or salary increase can alter the regret I feel for the times I missed. I have to say it wasn’t ego that drove me, but fear. Like most people, I worried about keeping my job so I could pay my bills and take care of my daughter. I wish I’d worked as hard achieving my own goals as I did for the different companies who bought my time, but wanted my whole life.

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dsc_0295In early 1982, I was scheduled to complete my military tour of duty and begin to work on a University degree. It was a terrible time to be leaving the security of a military paycheck during peace time. After getting out, I was so worried about finding a job that I almost reenlisted. The economy was much like it is today in terms of unemployment with 7.4 % of the nation out of work in November of 1982. Still I managed, I rented a room in the home of a local teacher for $25 a week. I had kitchen privileges and I shared a bathroom down the hall with two other people in the house. It wasn’t a perfect situation, but one I could afford.

Enrolling at S.U.N.Y. Oswego in upstate New York, I declared a major and managed to get a job on campus in the Sweet Shop, one of several jobs I would have during my time there. I eventually shifted south to the University of Georgia where I changed my major and graduated with a Theatre degree in 1987. By the time I graduated in June, I was married and six months pregnant with my only child.

Now, 27 years after I left the army, my daughter has entered the workforce in a similar economic situation. Actually, I think it’s much worse. As stressful as these times are for her, I wish it were possible for her to see something that took me years to really believe…that real happiness and security will not be found in the job that pays the most money or wields the most power, but in finding and doing the work she was meant to do. That’s a lot to ask of a 21 year old. I’ve not alway lived fearlessly in the ways I wish she could and I’m 27 years older. There are so many doors out there…so many choices. I wish she would take a little time to see what’s behind as many as possible so she can build a life with few regrets when looking back in 27 years.

 

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The Long Walk From Mevagissey To Gorran Haven & Back

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Yesterday John and I took a long walk along the south coast path of Cornwall. We began in the village of Mevagissey and picked up the path just past the harbor where colorful boats rocked gently and seagulls battled loudly for bits of dead fish floating near the boats in the low tide water that edged the harbor.

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With a fish that big you’d think they could share it, but most of time, the strongest one wants to take it all. Take a look in the two gulls over at the right in the picture above…don’t they look like they’re planning something.

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Meanwhile,  I think there may be more fish in the ( gulp) sea…

 

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Leaving the seagulls to battle over brunch, we climbed up out of the village and onto the path going towards Gorran Haven. The day could not have been more perfect, blue sky, a light wind, and everything blooming and greening up for spring. People in the village had paintbrushes out touching up for the season of tourists that come for summer holidays and school breaks. The coast path though was mostly empty with only a few people passing us fro the opposite direction. 

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This green space with sheep was what we could see when we looked to the right and below is what we saw on our left….        img_73035     

 

It’s a remarkable contrast…it reminds me of both Scotland and the California coast.

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You have to mind where you go as sometimes the path takes you right along the edge. 

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These forget-me-not flowers almost don’t look real. John said they were a bit early for this time of year and then he reminded me of how when I came to Cornwall to see him the first time, I brought him a packet of forget-me-not seeds. He planted them after I left  and they didn’t do well here in Cornwall. He has the nicest green thumb, but only one tiny flower survived. Of course, one can be enough…if it’s the right one.

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Directions & Choice

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Good Morning!

I’m like a snail most days… at least that’s what it feels like to me.

 

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I tend to check things out very throughly before moving in new directions… generally looking at things from all angles before proceeding.

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Although I don’t have a huge fear of failing when beginning a new project, I do tend to give things a good going over before taking a leap in a new direction.

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Occasionally, I worry that I’m moving so slowly that I’ll lose my momentum or that others will pass me by.

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Sometimes, even when the idea is there, there are just too many choices…and since I’m not really an either or kind of person…

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I generally will try more than one…….at the same time. 

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Unfortunately, there are times that even when I decide to choose one over the other, I’m still not as focused as I’d like. At least with this decision, I won’t go hungry. I’ll be back a little later with something more substantial….after breakfast…maybe?

 

 

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Shining A Light On The Impact Of Indecision

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Choices…sometimes there are just too many and I am unable to decide what to do next. So I sit, stuck in indecision. The impact of this affects a variety of other areas of my life chief of which is a low level restlessness that causes me to feel as if I’m not getting enough done. This doesn’t mean that I haven’t been productive in other areas, but the simple task of creating a post to share has caused me to do a bit of procrastinating where my blog is concerned. I could use a little help from my readers. So much happened on our honeymoon trip to Paris and I took so many pictures that every time I scroll through my images, I just can’t decide which to use and what stories to share with you. Here’s where you all come in…I’m going to post a few pictures and I’d like for you to leave a comment as to which ones intrigue you and leave you wanting to know more.

Please leave your response in the comment section by Sunday noon…that’s noon wherever you are and I’ll write about the picture or pictures that create the most interest.  Thanks for your help and I look forward to seeing your comments.

If there’s a comment for each one then I’ll respond to each in return so don’t feel you have to choose one based on what others have chosen.

(1) E with Painting

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(2) Artists

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(3) Cat

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(4) Monk

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(5) Window View

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(6) Painter

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(7) Doorknob

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(8) Backside

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(9) Woman

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(10) The Watchers

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(11) Dark Light

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(12) The Ring

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(13) Help

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(14) Help X 2

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(15)  Chagall ceiling


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That’s all for now and thanks for your thoughts.

 

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Paris…Then And Now

” When good Americans die they go to Paris ”

– Oscar Wilde

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I’ve been working on a few new things around here, and I’ll be back with something else in a bit, but here’s a little something I managed to capture in Paris.

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Flower Delivery For Abelard & Heloise Still There

If you’ve been reading my blog, you may have read about my gift for Abelard and Heloise.  If you haven’t, you might want to go back and take a look at yesterday’s post so this one will make sense to you now. Kim, a blogging friend in Paris took a little stroll up to Père Lachaise cemetery yesterday after reading my post to see what I left behind. She sent me word in the comment section of yesterday’s post that my wedding bouquet was still there.

Today, she very kindly sent me an email with a photograph she took of my bouquet at the grave. In the picture, you can see someone else has tossed a flower tribute as well. I left mine there on February 4th and it looks suprising good for being out there slightly more than three weeks. If you consider that I made my bouquet on February 1st, I’d say those flowers were a good buy.

Big thanks to Kim for sending this picture for me to share.  She’s added a new chapter to an already sweet memory.

Wedding Bouquet - 3 Weeks Later February 26, 2009

Wedding Bouquet - 3 Weeks Later February 26, 2009